If what you stand for doesn’t risk disapproval, it’s probably not a stand
“If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything”… goes the saying.
Indeed, it’s important to stand for something in life. It sounds powerful and even romantic - until it asks something from you.
I understand the benefits of standing for something. It builds trust, increases self-esteem, avoid being a doormat for other people’s selfishness etc.
But when it comes to taking actionable steps, I would start to feel the tension.
I will pause and even hesitate for a moment when it means speaking up could face the risk of disappointing others, disrupting the peace and being disliked.
Because a part of me still wants to be liked, to be accepted and to not rock the boat.
So here’s what I’m learning to manage:
I accept it’s only human to want approval.
But I can’t let it decide who I become.
Living for approval is exhausting.
Instead, remind yourself daily to honour and respect who you’re becoming - values, principles and purpose - and not manage how you want others to see you.
Do you feel this tension too? How do you manage it?
Contributor: Kausern Hieu