Trustworthiness = Competency × Character × Care & Challenge
The essential formula every leader needs to earn and sustain real trust.
Trust is the foundation of successful leadership. Without it, even the most brilliant vision or charismatic leader will struggle to gain traction.
When I was a young manager, I thought the quickest way to earn trust was to be likable. I leaned into what I now call “friendship leadership.” I joined my team’s out-of-office activities and tried to be the “cool boss.” In trying to show I cared, I over-coddled. I blurred boundaries and avoided tough conversations. Eventually, team members took liberties, and I would often picked up their slack just to keep the peace. It was draining and ultimately, ineffective.
That was when I learned that trust doesn’t come from being liked. It comes from being trustworthy which is grounded in the three pillars of trust (the 3 Cs):
1. Competency
Leaders must be capable. If your team can’t rely on you to deliver, solve problems, or make sound decisions, trust breaks down. Competency is about knowing your craft well enough to inspire confidence.
2. Character
More than just ability, trust is anchored in integrity. Leaders with character do what’s right not what’s easy. They’re consistent, fair, and honest.
3. Care & Challenge
Trust deepens when leaders genuinely care, not just about performance, but for their people. Yet care without challenge can lead to complacency. That’s why great leaders do both. They stretch their team while standing beside them. This is what we call ‘tough love’.
All in all, you could be brilliant (competent) but lack integrity (character)—trust fails. Or you could care deeply but lack the courage to challenge—trust becomes sentimental. But when trust is grounded in all three pillars, it becomes transformational.
Where might your trust equation be weakest today? Strengthen that pillar and watch how your influence grows.